A Parent's Legacy...

I don't know about you but I've been particularly interested in the Olympics this year. Typically I'm not a huge fan but have found myself mesmerized at 10pm by swimming, gymnastics, etc. I find it hard to get to bed at a decent time because the Olympic fever has peaked at around 11pm!! Watching these athletic wonders accomplish their dreams is addicting.

As I watch the Olympics, I have noticed how many of the athlete's parents are there cheering them on... The announcers go into the stories of how these parents have supported their kids from the get go, how they went to their games and practices, etc. And it made me wonder how things will be with Shelby...

Several months ago, Jon and I actually talked about Shelby, wondering what types of sports she will like... if she will want to play a musical instrument... if she will want to take dance lessons. We both agreed that one thing was a must, regardless of what she chooses, we will be there for her. We will take her to her practices and be there during them if allowed. We will watch her games and/or recitals. We will be there to support her, regardless if we like the event/sport/choice or not. It isn't about us. It is about what she enjoys doing and what is important to her.

When I was younger, I played basketball and participated in track and field. I also took dance and piano lessons. My mom would be there for the dance and piano recitals but refused to go to the sports practices and games because she "didn't like sports". I remember how awful it felt to be playing a game or winning a metal in the track meet and not having my family there to support me and cheer me on. I remember seeing all of the other supportive parents and watching the pride in their faces when they hugged their kids. I remember seeing them comfort their kids when they didn't get a metal or sustained an injury. I made a choice to participate in a "boys" activity and it was met with disapproval. I lived close to my middle school and remember running home in the dark after games and meets because they didn't want to pick me up from school. I had made a choice they didn't support. I never understood how they couldn't support me. I mean, my step dad loved sports. He'd watch them all the time. And Mom went out of her way to please him and bought tickets to Texas Rangers and Dallas Cowboys games, even though she hated sports. We'd still go to the games. I didn't understand the double standard (but that's another subject for another day with a therapist!). :-)

Jon and I decided a while back that regardless, we'd support Shelby. She may pick a sport or hobby we don't understand and loathe but that is her choice and her passion. I can't imagine where Olympian Michael Phelps would be today had his mom not been so supportive and stood by him all these years. Would he have won 8 gold metals? Would he have broken all of those world records? Doubtful. Parent's unconditional love and support means everything to a child. If they don't receive it, they carry that sting of rejection throughout their entire life. Trust me, it doesn't go away. Time doesn't heal all wounds. But what Jon and I can do is make sure that our daughter doesn't carry that around with her throughout her life. That she looks back and remembers that we loved her and supported her endeavors. That's the legacy we can leave behind.